Category Archives: humor

The Most Unique Blog Title (is not mine)

It’s a new year and I’ve decided to go back to tending my blog after a very long hiatus.  I was telling someone at work about it and told him he could just google the phrase “everyone is entitled to my opinion” — then I decided to google it myself to make sure it came up in the search results.  Well, it did, and on the first page too, but not at the top.  It looks like there are several other bloggers out there sharing the title, “Everyone is Entitled to My Opinion.”  So I guess everyone is entitled to my opinion and my title.  What’s more, I am not the only Lindarella on the internet.  Google it and you’ll see.  Apparently everyone is entitled to my name too!  I’m not greedy, but I’ve got to draw a line somewhere.  Therefore, I am declaring my dog’s name off limits.  At the moment, there is only ONE “Candy Mona Lisa La Puppaluppas” in the entire universe.  Google it and you’ll see — cute videos.  So to all of you dog owners (or cat, or lizard, or squirrel, whatever) out there, don’t even think about borrowing that name for your pet, or I’ll sic a pack of Dobermans on your butt!

Advertisements

Viral Videos

My last post was about a phrase I feel is vague and overused.  This one is about a word that is growing exponentially because of the speed of the Internet’s mass transmissions.  The word is “viral” — You’ve probably heard it and know what it means.  It’s anything that spreads and multiplies really, really fast, like a computer virus or an Internet email hoax or an epidemic.  Speaking of epidemics, Malcolm Gladwell has penned a timely book about the science of social epidemics — fads, trends, and ideas that start out relatively insignificant, but when a few small changes are factored in, become outrageously popular.  Those little changes, often surprisingly, are what cause the trend to reach a tipping point, where it then quickly becomes an epidemic.  In The Tipping Point, Gladwell gives lots of examples from history.  Anyone involved in the marketing of ideas and products should check this book out.

But “viral” is a word that is also a little vague.  On a website that features the top 10 viral videos and photos, I found a video with 7 views and one with over 2,500 views.  It seems they’re all humorous too.  Obviously, the selections are made by the author of that site.  But truly viral videos are Continue reading

What is a vast majority to you?

Are there words or phrases that bug you when you hear them used?  I don’t mean expressions like, “like,” “you know,” “so anyway…,” or any other patter that occurs during casual communications.  No, I’m talking about vague terminology and euphemisims used so often in the media and by the government that it makes one wonder if all of them are totally unaware of how annoying that is to the vast majority of people.

Take vast majority for instance. What percent constitutes a vast majority?  I tried to find out by Googling the exact phrase, “vast majority” and examining some of the 18.6 million results. Continue reading

Upcoming Topics:

I’ve made a list of topics to write about.  These topics come from two categories:  observations about life in general (my life, of course) and observations about television.  Here are some examples from my list:

  • The bigger the purse, the more that gets stuffed into it:  How to keep your shoulders level.
  • New surprises in the laundry.
  • “So you’re 46, huh?”
  • A review of the literature on shaking hands — what literature?
  • On emotional intelligence.
  • Dangerous pets.
  • Oh, the irony of it all!
  • Why we love those pharmaceutical commercials on TV.
  • Does Steven Tyler really drive a Lexus?  Dream on!

Set your dial right here for these exciting essays and more!

Announcing my new Advice Column!

As anyone that knows me will tell you, I am a good person to ask for advice.  I am never shy about giving it away for free.  What you do with it is your business.  If you want to ask me for advice or criticize my advice or add to my advice (just like Dear Abby’s column), pleae use the Advice 4U page to comment.  I am looking forward to your questions and comments.

Writer’s Block

If you’ve been reading my earlier posts, you already know I’m living with a sports fanatic.  You should see how his face lights up when he’s telling one of his baseball stories or blabbing out statistics — he’s clearly into it.  But since I was getting tired of hearing it all, I turned him on to blogging so he could find a wider audience.  I didn’t realize I was creating a monster!

Two distinct traits of my sports nut’s personality make this possible.  They are a craving of competition (in any form possible)  since he’s not pitching anymore, and becoming obsessed with whatever he’s into at the time.  Last weekend, it was the new Harry Potter book, but I’m sure he had a lot of company there.

Now he’s back to blogging compulsively:  comparing his stats with mine, obsessing over checking “the score,” and making sure he blogs daily to keep his numbers up.  He expects me to do the same. Continue reading

Harry Potter Withdrawal

 

“Withdrawal, also known as withdrawal syndrome, refers to the characteristic signs and symptoms that appear when a drug that causes physical dependence is regularly used for a long time and then suddenly discontinued or decreased in dosage. The term can also, less formally, refer to symptoms that appear after discontinuing a drug or other substance (unable to cause true physical dependence) that one has become psychologically dependent upon.”  (Wikipedia)

Would someone like to edit this Wikipedia entry to include symptoms that appear after finishing the final Harry Potter book?  My last entry focused on blogging addiction, but this is something else entirely.  The Sultan set aside his entire weekend to listen to the HP audiobook (17 CDs).  He holed himself up in his office with his laptop CD player until late Saturday night, slept briefly, and then got up Sunday to do more of the same, without watching “Meet the Press” (without any TV at all, which is unbelievable in itself), without talking on the phone, without eating, except for a few bowls of cereal, and most amazingly, without pestering me every few minutes with the number of views on his blog.  Thank God he finished the novel (approximately 22 hours total listening) by Sunday night though or he would not have made it to work on Monday! Continue reading